Acceptance and Judgement...

Do you know what I think is the #1 cause of death of the spirit of the scrapbooker?

Acceptance and Judgement

Acceptance keeps making little cameo appearances in this wacky world of paper crafting, and I'm beginning to wonder if it really should have a place here. The need for acceptance of our work, the desire to be accepted into the folds of the elite, the race to be accepted into positions that could speed up our ascension up that imaginary ladder. Those are the types of acceptance that I think the scrapbooking industry could do without. The good old fashioned acceptance of each other as individuals with different design perceptions... well that poor thing has been kicked, prodded and sentenced to a lifetime sentence in the dungeons of public opinion. Which brings me to judgement.

I swear if I say that beauty is in the eye of the beholder one more time, somebody take an eyelet setter to me. Judgement is the worst thing to happen to this industry, to this craft for that matter. The problem with judgement in scrapbooking is that even in it's most well meaning form, it is a determination that one (or some) person (people) are capable of producing better work than their peers. That in turn lays a firm foundation for glory seeking and yes, even more judgement. The sad thing is that while all of this judgement is going on, somewhere someone is packing up their scissors and paper because they don't feel that have "what it takes". Sadder still is that somewhere someone is struggling with a hobby that is supposed to fun and from the heart because she is trying to modify her work to make her more acceptable to those who judge her.

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I swear, it just makes me want to scream sometimes. I've been there; I hung up my paper trimmer for almost 6 months because of the judgement/acceptance game. I tried to be what I was told I needed to be to get where I thought I needed to get. I wound up chipping away at a scrapblock until I found my own style, albeit a style that was a representation of who I am as a crafter and not what I was being told what the industry dictated to be "in"...*gasp*. When I did that, I found myself eternally an undesirable... well, my family and friends thought I was good at what I did...but that still wasn't enough. I set myself on an impossible mission to achieve the goals that I felt I needed to achieve, while remaining true to my sense of style and design. It was an uphill battle in roller skates... and it almost cost me my hobby.

I walked away from scrapbooking completely. I closed up my craft room and resigned myself to do 'other things' during the time that I would normally be scrapping. I nursed my emotional wounds for 5 or so months. I did my soul searching and vacuuming at the same time (you should try it). One day, everything that I wrote in the last post hit me and it was like a bomb went off in my head. I rushed into my scrap room, dusted everything off, reinventoried, and reinvented myself. Well, actually... there was no need to reinvent... I just learned to accept myself. Since that day, the only acceptance that I've allowed myself to need is my own.
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I'm not going to be so stupid as to say that judgement and acceptance hasn't paved the way for many scrappers to take their craft to different levels (with or without ascension up the ladder), there is no doubt that it has pushed some who would've otherwise not pushed themselves. But sometimes it gets to the point where the judgement and acceptance are wielded like a razor edged sword and people really get hurt. That has no place here. How can a hobby that is geared around preserving memories so easily make room for the practice of ripping someone elses work apart for not other reason than the beholder not caring for it. There is always going to be some incredulous and crude comment about how 'so and so shouldn't have put that layout in a public gallery'; that can't be stopped unless you have a way to keep people from voicing their judgemental opinions. The problem with this is that it takes liberties with that scrapbookers that it has not right to. Really, who are we to tell someone that their work sucks simply because it doesn't appeal to our own personal sense of style? What right do we have to dictate that a person's work doesn't deserve a LO of the Day title because it doesn't meet our own unpublished list of guidelines for acceptable design? What right does anyone have to tell someone who chooses not to put a lot of embellishments on their layouts that they need to 'take it to the next level"?

I think that the main thing that is being forgotten in this industry is that scrapbooking is a form of artistic expression. [I don't give a hairy rats behind whether or not OTHER artists and scrappers see scrapbooking as artistic... that's just that whole judgement thing again. I see it as an artistic expression... and well, that's my opinion.] That expression is, at least for me, an extension of who I am. If the layouts that I create are an extension of how I see the world, what right does anyone else have to pass a judgement based on their own personal filters?

Critique Groups:
I can't sweep the good old critique group thing under the rug because it's a good thing when done correctly. Unfortunately, having seen some of the critiques that people get, much of the time the advice that they receive is little more solicited judgement. A critique, IMO, should be a tool with which to help the seeker bring continuity to their style of artistic representation. A critique should not attempt to lead the scrapper towards a path of creative expression that will be in conflict with her own creative spirit. All that gobbledygook simply means that if a critique of a layout includes telling an obviously clean and linear scrapper to "tilt this", "doodle here", "put some buttons and flowers there", despite the fact that he/she doesn't want any of that incorporated into her pages, then that critique becomes a judgement. A judgement based on the critiquers desire to change the layout to suit HER personal tastes. It really is hard to critique art because you have to step outside your personal preferences and sidle up next to the personal style of the person you are critiquing...otherwise you run the risk of giving advice that would create conflict with someones creative spirit.

You have to be able to accept the truths presented to you before you can work to affect them.

Sometimes, the scrapper might request a critique that could help her incorporate a style outside her comfort zone onto her pages. This should be the only instance where the above mentioned critiquing behavior should be employed; you've been asked to assault her creative spirit and she is ready to do battle with it to evolve. That too is a good thing.


Sadly, many have fallen into the habit of seeing pages that are not of their taste to be less than what they would deem acceptable. In doing this they have taken up the mettle of being judge, jury and executioner in the court of public opinion. I've gotten into the habit of checking my thoughts at the door before they run down the hall to my mouth or worse to my fingers, and it's really not that hard to train yourself to accept what is different.

• Is it really that much harder to accept that perhaps the layout is simple because the scrapper likes clean, graphic pages?
• Is there any possibility that the layout that is chocked to bursting with doodling and swirls is simply the inner workings of a playful mind instead of a 'ununified mess'?
• Perhaps the scrapbooker chose to use those colors or those types of patterned papers because she personally liked the way that they make your eyes cross and your nose bleed when you view them together. Everyone has a right to make a statement and nobody has the obligation to agree with it.

The masses have pretty much proven that they aren't willing to use acceptance and judgement in such a way that they do more good than harm, so I think it needs to go back to the depths from whence it came. The attitude of acceptance of ones differences should be celebrated once more instead of ridiculed. It doesn't help that the magazines have fertilized this atmosphere of nonacceptance with their insistence on selecting works for publishing that follow the set trend while overtly ignoring the rest of the majority (yes, we are the majority). So it's easy to see how some equate work that doesn't emulate the trends to inferiority. If the mags don't think it's worthy enough to be on the pages of the mags then why should their readership tolerate it's presence elsewhere in their lives?

If mama teaches you to ignore, disregard, or devalue work that is not like what you see in her magazine, how long do you think it will take for your readers to use that newly honed eye of judgement to tear down the work of others? Sometimes, mama is wrong.

I think that a large part of the responsibility for reinstating the attitude of general acceptance rests with the magazines that gave it the boot to begin with. If magazines would just take a chance on the public they might just be surprised. Yes, those who are loyalists will no doubt pull out their hair and gnash their teeth at the first sign of a layout that they consider "mediocre", but once the mags open the doors of acceptance to all of the scrapbookers out here who are not like what they deem to be "hot", they'll be surprised at the outcome.

Sometimes I wonder if anyone has ever thought of coming up with a Hippocratic oath for scrapbooking... I really think we need one.

Back to Basics... Please?

When I first started scrapbooking, Creative Memories' get'r done style was all that I knew. I had my cardstock (CM of course). I had my patterned paper (CM...of course). I had my stickers (guess). AND I had my creative imagination (as in cerebral, not the company itself). I would sit at my desk and scrap my little heart out without a care in the world. I would occassionally consult with one of their design pamphlets to get a better grasp on a particular design principal but for the most part, I was flying by the seat of my artsey fartsey pants.

Then I dared to venture into the scrapbooking section at a local store and thine eyes were forced open. The different mediums and paper patterns and textured cardstock took my breath away. I wanted more of THAT! Suddenly, what I'd been doing started to fall in my personal popularity poll. I kept on chuckin' along but incorporated a few of the "contraband" goodies that I bought elsewhere into my work.

Then, I discovered the whole online arena. With that came the prospect of getting published and garnering validation from my peers. That folks, was my undoing. Suddenly I couldn't put down a piece of ribbon without worrying about whether it would follow a design principal. I couldn't construct a layout without worrying about how it would be perceived..not by me or my family...but by people who didn't know me from Adam. My stash grew and with it the indecisiveness that too many choices affords us. I had a scraproom full of stuff and I had a creativity block the size of Texas standing in my way.

When I sit back and think of the good old days when I loved everything that I did and everything I did was good...I feel a little arterial tug. I didn't do the sticker sneeze thing...it looked kind of out of place. I did, however, indulge myself in some very liberal use of punches and minor doodling. I just made pages and it was ALL about preserving memories. It's really sad when I look at my daughter's scrapbook and realize that I know more about her days of infancy than I do about her toddler years because of the way I let myself be influenced. The detailed stories have been replaced with little journaling blocks and store bought embellishments. I've never really gotten away from the 2-page & multiple picture layouts, but there are less of them than in the beginning. I feel as if somewhere along the way, I lost myself and it makes me sad.

Now when I sit at my desk I'm overwhelmed. I have hundreds of sheets of cardstock to choose from, twice that much patterned paper, and every embellishment that tickled my fancy for 2 years. Alas, for some reason, I struggle with every layout. I just don't really know where to begin anymore. I didn't sign up for this.

How about with the basics?

That has been my pledge for 2007 and I invite anyone who happens to read this to join me on my crusade. I haven't bought any scrap stash since December and I feel great. It's odd really because I have all of these gift certificates for scrapbooking stores and I don't want anything. I'm thinking about maybe oneday rak-ing them to someone who is still caught up in the buying frenzy, but that would be advocating for something that I've come to despise, wouldn't it?

It has been a blessing and a curse to have allowed myself to lose touch with the retail scrapbooking mosh pit, but I think it's the right thing for me. I can't fix the industry's problems but I can fix my own and that's exactly what I've been workin' on.

Back to basics... Eureka...who woulda thunkit?

How does one go about getting Back to Basics?


1. Write "There is no RIGHT way. There is no WRONG way. There is only MY way." on a sheet of paper and stick it where you can see it often. Read it. Know it. Love it.

2. Swear off new purchases of scrapbooking items that you already have. Patterned paper, cardstock, rubons, stickers, ect. Replacement of tools is perfectly acceptable because don't we need those to work our craft. Implementing a new type of tool is a thin-ice issue because it's up to you to determine whether the tool is a need or a want and whether the frequency of usuage will outweigh the cost.

3. Vow to ONLY use what you have in your stash. If you run out of black cardstock, perhaps there is another comparable color that would work just as well. Not enough sheets of a particular patterned paper? Spread that baby thin and perhaps consider incorporating complimentary pp with it. It's known fact that many women who go into a store for a $.75 piece of paper walk out with their wallets $1-$15 lighter. MAKE DO!

4. Set a goal for yourself, and make it reasonable AND flexible. Commit yourself to finishing a layout, or a few layouts within a time period. Commit yourself to finishing an album or going back and adding the journaling that you'd put off for later. Scrap what YOU want to scrap. Just because you have committed yourself to finishing your dogs album doesn't mean that Fluffy gets center stage everytime you think about scrapbooking.

5. Constrain yourself. This works well if you are like me and have far too many choices. I pick some paper, some cardstock and a few generic embellisments (i.e., alpha rubons, ribbon, blossoms, ect.) and I ziplock them. That is what I have to work with. Then I find pictures that would work with my paper choices and have at it.
When and ONLY when, I've gone through the supplies I've alotted, I then allow myself to go through my more specific embellishments to see if I have anything that I might want to add to the layout (i.e., a tag that says "Kitty" or whatever). I find that by creating the layout and THEN embellishing the layout, the focus stays on the memory that I want to preserve and the embellishments are no longer given the power to become the focal point of the layout.

6. Know what you have. Know what you will actually use. Take all of that paper off the pedestal and make plans to use it. I find that by taking a few minutes each Friday to go through and observe what I have in stock, I know what I have to choose from. Sometimes this very act motivates me to lump like items together to make a kit. All of my supplies have been demoted so there are no longer papers that are too pretty to use or rainy day embellishments. I'm rutheless. You should be too.

7. Ask yourself "Do YOU like it?" and answer yourself. If you do, give a reason why.
If you don't give yourself a reason why not, and address those issues. It's so important that you do this because it becomes the foundation for validation. I have an online gallery full of layouts that I like...many don't, but I do and I'm good with that. I didn't ask anyone else their opinion, so their opinion doesn't matter. I did however, ask myself and if it's in that gallery, you can bet your sweet behind that I like it. That is a good thing.

8. Abolish the notion of getting caught up. You aren't truly caught up until the ability to generate memories is dead. You pretty much have to cease brain function for that to happen. So why would you volunteer to be brain dead?

9. Smile when you work. Okay, some people are allergic to smiling. Connect with your pictures...how about that. If you are scrapping pictures without feeling any emotion for the pictures that you are working with, then are you really preserving a memory or just making a scrapbook page. If you allow yourself to be embraced by the emotion of the picture (or in the case of those stalwart/expressionless heritage pictures, the emotion of the era), then hopefully you will be able to bring more to your layout.

10. Remember that this is supposed to be a hobby. Hobbies, by their very nature are intended to be a release, of sorts, from the daily grind. Releases can be fun...should be fun, really. If you are more tense after scrapbooking than you were before you started...maybe you need to rethink your strategy.

Multiple DT Gigs...Greed or An Earned Right?

Disclaimer: I have been on Design Teams before. I have participated in a more DT calls than I've successfully walked away from. I don't possess the proverbial sour grapes. I was once wrapped up in the pursuit of DT assignments, but I chose to walk away after what I saw myself becoming. I am writing my thoughts here because I think it's an issue that needs to be written about...without emotion, without defensiveness.
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Why do some people feel the need to be on 10+ (even 5+) Design Teams, Creative Teams, Dream Teams?

Why does a person who already holds DT positions with major manufacturers, and some of the more popular online stores, feel the need to throw their names in the hat for DT calls held for small upstart companies as well?

Mind you, I'm not being mean spirited, not in the least. Those questions have been asked time and time again in the past. It never fails though, that every time the question is raised, some acquisitive scrapbooker gets defensive (and even ugly) about having her intentions questions.

Why not question it? Do we not question everything else in our world?

Why not ask, "When is enough enough?"? My mother always taught me that just because you CAN doesn't mean you SHOULD. That lesson went hand in hand with the whole sharing thing that was drilled into my head from the earliest years that I can recollect.

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Typical Scenario: Suzy Multi-DTer is being questioned about her decision to try to acquire as many DT positions online as she can:

Why do you submit for DT calls when you know that you already have tons of DTs under your belt? You already have the experience.Do you not have and advantage over the other gals who are trying to cut their teeth?
SM: DT calls are made to the general public. That means that everyone is given the opportunity to show the store owners what they have to offer. If the other applicants don't have what the owner needs to propel her store then they need to hone their craft more. I can't help it if the store owners picks my layouts over the other entrants.

Yes, you can. The store owner can't select a layout that isn't submitted.

SM: Why should I sit out a call so that others can get their "fair shake" at getting a DT position? If I can handle all of the responsibilities that I'm heaping on my plate, then it should be no body's business but my own.

Why shouldn't you? Do you ever say, "okay, I have enough". Do you ever ask if being on that particular team will help you grow anything other than your resume? True, you are the master of your own fate. You have your impressive resume, and that can pretty much woo any new store owner to snatch you up. But, do you have the time to commit to the site because of your other team commitments? I don't mean the bare contractual minimum posting/participation requirements. I mean, the true dedicated commitment, like that which the lesser experienced scrappers who've been with the site from the word "jump" have proven to have.

SM: I tried for the DT. I got picked up for the DT. Did I know that I would? No...it's a crap shoot, fair game for everyone. My experience speaks for itself and if people can't bring their A game into the call, then they shouldn't apply. How I manage my time is my business. I fulfill my contractual agreement and I receive the promised compensation for lending my talent to the store. Everyone gets what they came for. Everyone is happy.
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Everyone except the people who were passed over for someone who'd never bothered to grace the site with her presence until the DT call hit the wires. Everyone except the owner when she discovers that she has lost some of the people who stood by her when she first opened because, despite her constantly praising their work and their loyalty, she saw dollar signs when she saw your resume and went with her wallet instead of giving her true supporters a chance to help her grow. She has loaded their DT with a bunch of heavy hitters who are not truly interested in the success of the site...just how much product they can get out of their meager contribution.

It isn't really an ethical question.
It's not a moral one either.
Is it about good sportsmanship?

I don't get it, really. Personally for me, every DT that I've tried out for has been for a site that I'd decided was a good fit for my personality. I've gone to a site for a call and spent weeks trying to see if I could contribute to the site only to walk away without submitting because it felt like championing for that site would start to look like work because I didn't fit in. I wasn't so arrogant as to think that I was a shoe-in, but what good is it to play to lose? I knew that, IF chosen, I wouldn't be able to support the store as much as a person who was really enamoured with it...so I left.
It never ceased to amaze me how suddenly all of these extremely published and DT heavy scrapbookers show up towards the end of the DT calls. Suddenly, the site is declared so "Rawkin' " (even if it doesn't have a gallery yet and the store inventory is still a work in progress) and they are "nervous" (as seasoned as they are) about the call but excited for the "lucky" girls (knowing that they'd probably be one of them). They sidle up to the owner with high prasie for the "rawkin'" site/store and coddling and they try to be everyone's bestest friend. When the results are announced they were so "shocked" if they are picked (don't you think the shock of winning would wear off after say the 10th one?) or they are ghost if they didn't get picked up. I've only witnessed one instance where a known scrapbooker stuck around despite not getting picked up...and she was gone within 2 weeks.

There was one special instance that I recall where one of the Super DTers hadn't acknowledged her acceptance into the surprise semi-final round of a smaller site's DT call. Surprise, because none of the applicants were aware that there would be a semi-final round. I hadn't made it to that level, but I liked the site so I was trying to deal with my feelings of dejection. Well, I received my Scrapsubmit call email and went to check out some of the sites that had calls going. I needed motivation to pull me out of a productivity slump and I thought a DT would do that. I found the MIA semi-finalist on 5 other sites that were hosting calls. She was at full throttle laying it on thick. At first I thought that it served her right to not know about her semi-finalist status, she was obviously so uninterested in the site that she couldn't be bothered with going back to congratulate the winners. Then my conscience weighed in and I figured that she probably didn't know that they'd announced a semi-finalist round and probably assumed that she hadn't been picked. So I pm'ed her and let her know that she'd been selected as a semi-finalist. Her reply?
"Oh, thanks for letting me know! Do you have a link to it?".
I was so shocked that I didn't even reply. True, I used the abbreviated name for the site, but if she was as excited about the site that she had professed to be on the boards, wouldn't she know the site, even under truncated name? As it just so happened, she had an application in for so many calls in that she had a time keeping track of them. She obviously figured it out because she came swooping back in a blaise of shocked gratitude for "being given the opportunity to possibly represent the store" the next day. When the DT was announced, she didn't get picked up, so at least I didn't have to see her posts all the time (yes, she too disappeared).

DT calls are fair game.
True, that's how they are intentioned to be. But are they? Really? Or are they simply yet another arena that the perceived 'haves' can manipulate to their advantage? I overheard some pretty frank comments from someone who I assumed to be a super-DTer while shopping in Michael's last winter. She was with another lady in the next aisle over and was talking about a call that ended that night. Her friend/sister/mom/lover/whoever asked her if she wasn't already on like 200 DT's, to which the Super-DTer laughed in agreement. Then she said, "I know, but I can't help it, it's like taking candy from a baby. I show up and they swoon". They both thought it was so funny that lesser experienced loyal members didn't stand a chance. I was disgusted. First by the fact that she thought it was so funny and then by the fact that she'd actually resurrected and interjected the word "swoon" into the common English language of our day. The conversation is stuck in my head because of that word! But I also had to give her credit for at least being honest and finally answering the darned question.

I can't help but think that there is more truth in the mentality of that woman that there is in the entitlement chant that is prevalent on the message boards whenever the same questions are raised there.
Does doing it because "you can" really get anyone very far? Remember Monopoly? Did it really get you far to buy up all of the property that you could? What about when you wound up on you opponent's single property but had no money to pay the penalty and had to sell your own real estate to clear your indebtedness? Bill Gates has the resources to buy up so much, but he doesn't; he is selective about how he spreads himself and his wealth. He knows when enough is enough.

I don't hunger for DT's anymore. I am not in the market to barter my skills for product or accolades. I don't have time to commit myself to a site. I don't desire to see my name in print other than on my novel should I ever finish writing it. I just want to see some honesty, once and for all. I just want someone to finally answer the question that has been skirted every time it's raised. Why do you NEED to be on that many DTs? When is enough enough?

Scrap Slump? Are the 'Glory' days of Scrapping gone?

I took a trip to Pat Catan's this weekend. I wasn't in the market for any additional scrap stash, I was just in the area, saw the sign, and pulled into the driveway.

I remember the good old days of PC shopping. The scrapbooking/stamping aisles were always full of people picking over their scrapbooking goodies, lugging loaded baskets around while they searched out the next great deal. And THAT was happening in the middle of the week during lunch!

I went in this weekend and had I wanted anything scrapbooking related, I could've had my choice of aisles to plop down and lay claim to. I spoke to an associate that was in the process of moving some items to the clearance bins upstairs. She informed me that they have been noticing a decline in scrapbooking sales/interest over the past 3 or 4 months. She also informed me that they've recieved smaller quatities of the scrapbooking/papercrafting magazines that they used to have and now instead of having a rack full of them, you have to search them out on aisle hangers. I figured that she was either not a scrapbooker or not one who had an expanded database of online scrap communities from which to garner knowledge. Why? Because she said, "we just can't figure out why...".

I looked around the store and sure enough, there were people everywhere. In the floral department, in the woodcrafting sections, painting section, and the bead section was packed, so I didn't even bother. There seemed to be a lot of people shopping that day (I know this because I stood in line for 10 minutes to buy a bucket of plastic foamie shapes for my daughter), but nobody was flocking to the scrapbooking area. Trust me, I've been going to that store for almost 2 years now and it was truly an anamoly.

All of this brought to mind the possibility of the industry truly drying up. I know that there is a constant influx of new (and not so new) product, but what does this mean if people aren't buying it? Is everyone really shopping online? I swung over to Joanne's after Pat's and it was pretty much the same story there.

I like to think that the negativity in the industry is small potatoes when compared to the other issues that could be having an impact on the register sales of all things scrapbooking:

*Too much too similar product by too many too similar designers/companies.
*Over priced/packaged products that just don't offer the bang for the buck feature that many scrapbookers look for.
*A decrease of the number of people who are trying to be published and a return to the basics with an emphasis on using one's existing stash first and foremost. Perhaps these people made a habit of running out and buying the latest and greatest while they were persuing publishing?
*A small scale exodus from the scrapooking hobby by people who either have given it up or no longer have time for the hobby.
*Growing dissatisfaction with the industry as a whole and the major magazine's as a facet.
*The ability to get more for less from online store.


I've noticed that even for myself, all of those factors have had an impact on how much scrapbooking I do. I no longer pursue publishing or DT work and I have the freedom of creation that I've always wanted. I really don't care one way or the other if the industry implodes... I think it's overdue anyway. Am I worried that when I finally go through my stash that I won't be able to replenish my supplies? Nope, I'll probably wind up selling off my stuff before I get to that point... or I'll be scrapping until I'm 80.